There will be celebration in the streets of Crans-Montana, Switzerland (yes, Montana is in Switzerland. You didn't know that?) for the next few days.
Skier Lindsey Vonn won her 10th career World Cup downhill today. Apparantly. She is now the United States record holder for most titles. Or fastest time. Or some other shit, maybe she's just really hot.
"I can't believe I finally did it. Nobody thought I could accomplish this, mainly because theres nobody here." Vonn said, motioning to the crowd.
"I love Lindsey, I've been following her for years. My favorite part is finding the one other spectator at the event and standing right next to them. Creeps them the fuck out." commented Vonn superfan Miley Cyrus, wearing a t-shirt with a face-punchingly lame quote.
"You're not VONNA believe it.... get it? Because her last name is Vonn and she's.... wait a minute, what's my appeal again?"
Vonn will next compete in the Disney 2nd Annual Tower Of Terror Downhill Classic. The first one was a real mess, let me tell you.
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