The first split squad spring training games against helpless college kids in Fort Myers. This is where heroes are born, where stories of legend are written. This is what days and days of casually hitting BP and going to the weight room have all been for.
Goosebumps.
The RedSox were locked up in a tight one with Boston College today on the diamond, and time was running out. With the RedSox coming up to bat, the team exploded for 8 runs to break a 0-0 tie in the 2nd inning, just in the nick of time.
The RedSox would limp to the finish line and just get past the Eagles after tacking on a few critical insurance runs and winning 24-0.
Things weren't looking good when the Eagles made the MLB underdogs pay in the 5th inning with a hit off reliever Javy Lopez. Thankfully, the team manned up and slammed the door shut, limiting the vicious offense 1 total base in the game off the single.
The RedSox showed good plate discipline facing a BC pitching staff infamous for their mastery of the strike zone, amassing 15 walks.
"This was a great and fun experience. Surely I won't spend tonight crying in the shower due to something that has scarred me for life" Eagles pitcher Steven Cadoret said after the game. Cadoret pitched two thirds of an inning, giving up eight runs (6 ER) off five hits and five walks. He posted a modest ERA of 81.00 for the performance.
"Wow, that guy sucks." former RedSox pitcher Eric Gagne said of the stat line.
Another group of RedSox players will take on Northeastern in a few hours.
"I think we have a good shot" Northeastern left fielder Phay Kname said optomistically.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Ciaccio On Sox Spring Training : "Me Drive Car"
WEEI.com decided to take Steve "Chach" Ciaccio, a producer for WEEI and their morning show, on the road with them to Fort Myers to blog the events going on at RedSox Spring Training. The result they're getting is a guy with no business using a keyboard basically describing everything he sees. My fake spin is not needed here, these are some direct lines from the blog, showing Ciaccio's mastery of both the english language and captivating an audience.
Don't believe me? Check it out here. http://weei.com/pages/1681386.php?
We move the City of Palms Park tomorrow (see photos).
Morley Safer of 60 minutes is in town. He showed up about 10 this morning. Apparently he is interviewing Francona and others for an upcoming 60 minutes piece. He is shorter than expected.
As the entire media waits for the overweight addition of one Bartolo Colon. <<-- note the period, this is the complete sentence.
Also got another chance to get blown, or is it blowed Emmitt, off by Schilling.
I'll check back later today, gotta get in line for Hannah Montana 3D tonight
Pretty cool outdoor bar, once again never happen in Boston, not enough space, and it isn't 80 during pregame!
As I try to gain approval of the Big show. <<-- again, period. End of sentence.
Back to Celeb Don't forget the lyrics as they are trying to figure out a Michael Jackson tune, Wanna Be Startin' Something. Admit it you flicked it on! We'll give you some Baseball stuff tomorrow.
The final one is my favorite, nothing says "RedSox Spring Training blog" like coverage of Don't Forget The Lyrics. More to come, I'm sure, stay tuned to the link above to find out what he had for breakfast.
Don't believe me? Check it out here. http://weei.com/pages/1681386.php?
We move the City of Palms Park tomorrow (see photos).
Morley Safer of 60 minutes is in town. He showed up about 10 this morning. Apparently he is interviewing Francona and others for an upcoming 60 minutes piece. He is shorter than expected.
As the entire media waits for the overweight addition of one Bartolo Colon. <<-- note the period, this is the complete sentence.
Also got another chance to get blown, or is it blowed Emmitt, off by Schilling.
I'll check back later today, gotta get in line for Hannah Montana 3D tonight
Pretty cool outdoor bar, once again never happen in Boston, not enough space, and it isn't 80 during pregame!
As I try to gain approval of the Big show. <<-- again, period. End of sentence.
Back to Celeb Don't forget the lyrics as they are trying to figure out a Michael Jackson tune, Wanna Be Startin' Something. Admit it you flicked it on! We'll give you some Baseball stuff tomorrow.
The final one is my favorite, nothing says "RedSox Spring Training blog" like coverage of Don't Forget The Lyrics. More to come, I'm sure, stay tuned to the link above to find out what he had for breakfast.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Bartolo Calzone Eats Plane Ticket
It would appear the RedSox have agreed to a preliminary agreement with former Cy Young winner Bartolo Colon in a low risk, potential high reward deal. Colon still needs to pass a physical that will likely be the kiss of death on the deal.
Bartolo's enthusiasm for taking a physical is understandably not very high, in fact, so low that he missed his plane flight last night. Or did he?
"It's being reported wrong, Bartolo didn't miss his plane to Fort Myers. He was more than ready to hop on board and sit down in a row of seats, but we had a last minute change of heart." RedSox Manager Terry Francona said.
"The real problem wasn't getting him to fly to Fort Myers, it was our concern that he wouldn't FIT in Fort Myers." Francona continued.
General Manager Theo Epstein elaborated on Francona's comments. "Terry's right, but lets take it one step further. Nothing short of divine intervention would have got him to even fit inside the plane to begin with. We don't have accomodations ready for somebody that fat..... and we've had David Wells."
RedSox closer Jonathan Papelbon was thrilled to hear of the delay, not yet done setting up his welcoming prank for Colon at the workout facilities.
"I found this gag pitching mound we're installing. It has this fuckin sensor thing in it so when his fat ass steps on the rubber it makes a grunting noise and yells 'who parked the equipment truck on me?' " Papelbon explained while working his way through a 30 rack of Coors Light.
Papelbon continued to explain his master plan. "I'm hoping to get C.C Sabathia down here to pitch a simulated game against Colon, think about it. That pitching mound is going to be flat after about two innings. What does C.C stand for anyway? Chocolate cake? Clams casino?"
In order to break Papelbons train of thought, a CD of the Dropkick Murphy's was hastily thrown into a nearby player. Reporters left Fort Myers quietly as Papelbon burst into dance and tore his pants off to reveal a kilt he apparantly never leaves home without for such occasions.
Bartolo's enthusiasm for taking a physical is understandably not very high, in fact, so low that he missed his plane flight last night. Or did he?
"It's being reported wrong, Bartolo didn't miss his plane to Fort Myers. He was more than ready to hop on board and sit down in a row of seats, but we had a last minute change of heart." RedSox Manager Terry Francona said.
"The real problem wasn't getting him to fly to Fort Myers, it was our concern that he wouldn't FIT in Fort Myers." Francona continued.
General Manager Theo Epstein elaborated on Francona's comments. "Terry's right, but lets take it one step further. Nothing short of divine intervention would have got him to even fit inside the plane to begin with. We don't have accomodations ready for somebody that fat..... and we've had David Wells."
RedSox closer Jonathan Papelbon was thrilled to hear of the delay, not yet done setting up his welcoming prank for Colon at the workout facilities.
"I found this gag pitching mound we're installing. It has this fuckin sensor thing in it so when his fat ass steps on the rubber it makes a grunting noise and yells 'who parked the equipment truck on me?' " Papelbon explained while working his way through a 30 rack of Coors Light.
Papelbon continued to explain his master plan. "I'm hoping to get C.C Sabathia down here to pitch a simulated game against Colon, think about it. That pitching mound is going to be flat after about two innings. What does C.C stand for anyway? Chocolate cake? Clams casino?"
In order to break Papelbons train of thought, a CD of the Dropkick Murphy's was hastily thrown into a nearby player. Reporters left Fort Myers quietly as Papelbon burst into dance and tore his pants off to reveal a kilt he apparantly never leaves home without for such occasions.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Zach Thomas Drools On Paper In Dallas
It would appear from early leaked reports linebacker Zach Thomas, formerly of the Dolphins, has agreed to a deal with the Dallas Cowboys today.
Thomas, once a monster of the gridiron putting up 20 tackle games with regularity, has been slowed down from age. Also slowing him down are multiple concussions and shots off the head, such as the one from a car accident that landed him on injured reserve last year.
"Mmmf scrmf, hng." Thomas told our reporters while flapping his arms wildly.
Thomas continued he was excited about inking an apparant 1 year, $3 million dollar deal with the Cowboys. He then became frustrated trying to open a carton of milk.
"Parcells tuna. That funny." Thomas said with a glimmer in his eyes before hurling a toy firetruck across the room. Nobody present was comfortable asking the gentle giant if he was referring to Parcells letting him go in Miami, or if he was still under the impression Parcells coached in Dallas.
Many, including myself, thought Thomas would have been a great fit in the Patriots rotation of once great middle linebackers. This would bring into question just how low the Patriots offer that was given to Thomas was.
"Five bucks." Coach Bill Belichick said. "I didn't even want him. I mean, look at him, he's fucking retarded. If he lands face first on the bottom of a pile, he'll probably suffocate because he can't figure out how to get up."
The Patriots coach continued about Thomas. "I was just hoping offering him a contract would make Specter and the rest of you Spygate turds change the subject for a God damn minute. I mean, seriously. Shut the fuck up."
"HYAAAAAH, DAT BOY GONNA GIT EM GOOD" proclaimed Cowboys coach Wade Phillips on the signing (or possibly something completely unrelated). After some awkward silence, no further comments were requested.
Thomas, once a monster of the gridiron putting up 20 tackle games with regularity, has been slowed down from age. Also slowing him down are multiple concussions and shots off the head, such as the one from a car accident that landed him on injured reserve last year.
"Mmmf scrmf, hng." Thomas told our reporters while flapping his arms wildly.
Thomas continued he was excited about inking an apparant 1 year, $3 million dollar deal with the Cowboys. He then became frustrated trying to open a carton of milk.
"Parcells tuna. That funny." Thomas said with a glimmer in his eyes before hurling a toy firetruck across the room. Nobody present was comfortable asking the gentle giant if he was referring to Parcells letting him go in Miami, or if he was still under the impression Parcells coached in Dallas.
Many, including myself, thought Thomas would have been a great fit in the Patriots rotation of once great middle linebackers. This would bring into question just how low the Patriots offer that was given to Thomas was.
"Five bucks." Coach Bill Belichick said. "I didn't even want him. I mean, look at him, he's fucking retarded. If he lands face first on the bottom of a pile, he'll probably suffocate because he can't figure out how to get up."
The Patriots coach continued about Thomas. "I was just hoping offering him a contract would make Specter and the rest of you Spygate turds change the subject for a God damn minute. I mean, seriously. Shut the fuck up."
"HYAAAAAH, DAT BOY GONNA GIT EM GOOD" proclaimed Cowboys coach Wade Phillips on the signing (or possibly something completely unrelated). After some awkward silence, no further comments were requested.
Swinging For The Barbed Wire Fences
The King of Artificial Swing is in shape to play baseball, Barry Bonds agent Jeff Borris says.
While waiting to see what comes to life from perjury and obstruction of justice charges, Bonds has tuned himself up and done everything but "face live pitching" at this point.
"We've heard good things about the prisons in Florida, but Barry seems to really have his heart set on playing for the Metropolitan Correctional Center in San Diego", Borris told reporters.
Bonds is still teamless after the Giants allowed him to walk last year. Teams such as Oakland have flirted with the idea of signing him, but the muffin-head mutant remains a free agent.
"Nigga, you crazy" stated Oakland Athletics General Manager Billy Beane when asked about his interest in signing Bonds.
Bonds' agent has rationalized no logical Prison League team would not want him on their roster, pointing out nearly all baseball fields in the PL circuit are smaller than the ones Bonds smashed home runs out of in the Majors.
"I mean, think about it. The fence is generally going to be about 100 feet closer, and Barry is going to be bugged out of his mind off White Lightning. Put a bat with some pop behind him for protection, and 80 home runs is not out of the question."
No Prison League managers were available for comment on the issue.
While waiting to see what comes to life from perjury and obstruction of justice charges, Bonds has tuned himself up and done everything but "face live pitching" at this point.
"We've heard good things about the prisons in Florida, but Barry seems to really have his heart set on playing for the Metropolitan Correctional Center in San Diego", Borris told reporters.
Bonds is still teamless after the Giants allowed him to walk last year. Teams such as Oakland have flirted with the idea of signing him, but the muffin-head mutant remains a free agent.
"Nigga, you crazy" stated Oakland Athletics General Manager Billy Beane when asked about his interest in signing Bonds.
Bonds' agent has rationalized no logical Prison League team would not want him on their roster, pointing out nearly all baseball fields in the PL circuit are smaller than the ones Bonds smashed home runs out of in the Majors.
"I mean, think about it. The fence is generally going to be about 100 feet closer, and Barry is going to be bugged out of his mind off White Lightning. Put a bat with some pop behind him for protection, and 80 home runs is not out of the question."
No Prison League managers were available for comment on the issue.
Jerome Mathis Can't Wait Three Months
Could somebody take a minute out of their day and tell NFL players to stop trying to kill things when the cleats are off?
Jerome Mathis, borderline NFL player and kick returner for the Texans, decided his six months pregnant wife needed a good choking on Friday. Mathis, amassing a career stat line consisting of 80 more receiving yards than mine, could reportedly face up to a year in jail.
"I was actually trying to put my fingers in her nose, but my depth perception is really bad so I missed" said Mathis of the incident. He referenced several of his kick returns as evidence of the claim.
Stricken with grief after committing the act, Mathis left the house. He came back the following Sunday, and the selfish bitch had him arrested.
"Coach Kubiak never puts me in on defense, so I don't get to hit nothin durin the season. It's frustrating, " Mathis continued.
"That preggo belly had her looking like Vince Willfork, I just got the instinct to light that motherfucker up"
Mathis has a previous misdemeanor due to his pitbull "being aggressive", which is one of the few accurately reported things in this blog. Which is odd, because it looks like a line the racist guy at your office would come over and write in while you were away from the computer.
Jerome Mathis, borderline NFL player and kick returner for the Texans, decided his six months pregnant wife needed a good choking on Friday. Mathis, amassing a career stat line consisting of 80 more receiving yards than mine, could reportedly face up to a year in jail.
"I was actually trying to put my fingers in her nose, but my depth perception is really bad so I missed" said Mathis of the incident. He referenced several of his kick returns as evidence of the claim.
Stricken with grief after committing the act, Mathis left the house. He came back the following Sunday, and the selfish bitch had him arrested.
"Coach Kubiak never puts me in on defense, so I don't get to hit nothin durin the season. It's frustrating, " Mathis continued.
"That preggo belly had her looking like Vince Willfork, I just got the instinct to light that motherfucker up"
Mathis has a previous misdemeanor due to his pitbull "being aggressive", which is one of the few accurately reported things in this blog. Which is odd, because it looks like a line the racist guy at your office would come over and write in while you were away from the computer.
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